Wake Up Call

Ok. So, for those of you that know me well you already know that I tend to prefer the 2x4 method of learning. Once again, I was to a point where I was catching myself feeling down and kinda hopeless a bit too often. This pretty much always comes down to the same thing... I've been slacking on my end of the deal spiritually. IE: reading my scriptures. I do great for awhile, then good for awhile, then I suck. I've been sucking for way too big awhile! We do pretty good (always room for improvement) with family scriptures, but personal has been pretty much nonexistent. This all ties in with the energy work Heather has been working with me on, which I'll get more into on another post soon, but for now... Why do I know things in my head are right or are good for me, but still not do them? Same with not exercising, food, etc. I know certain things make me feel better but I sabotage and punish myself by not doing them. I'm going to get it figured out and changed though...striving for it! Determined in fact. Anyways, there are some beliefs I hold that I'm really wanting to get turned around and Heather reminded me to really get on my personal prayer and scripture study.

Honestly, I did the whole kinda read a few verses before I go to bed for 2 nights (woohoo! hey, gotta start somewher!). I always start back that way...even though I'm not really putting any real effort into it. Then I skipped last night entirely. So when I woke up this AM I picked up my scriptures before I even got out of bed AND said a prayer first. I did the whole get quiet, close my eyes, and feel for the right place to start thing (I love random scripture time!) Gotta love a not so gentle reminder, but it was so perfect for me right now. See, earlier this week my keys got locked in the car in the Wal-Mart parking lot. I had some perishables in the back seat, Tayvin in my arms, and had just thrown all the change and my keys on the front seat after unlocking that door and then shut it. As I went to put Tayvin in her seat I remembered I hadn't unlocked the other doors. Whatdya know, the door I unlocked had mysteriously re-locked itself. GRRRR. Yeah. Not so happy. It took a lot of time and frustration and trips back n forth to the store with Robert and blah blah blah. Couldn't find the spare key to save my life. I finally broke down. It wasn't the frustration crying either, it was straight up why doesn't God listen to me, love me, answer my prayers cry. I haven't experienced that for awhile. A few years back I really grasped onto the fact that everything happens for a reason and to not get mad at God, but to see what I could learn from whatever was happening to me. Unfortunately, I've been slacking and needed a refresher course. So, here's what I read this morning:

Doctrine and Covenants 101:7-9
7 They were slow to hearken unto the voice of the Lord their God; therefore, the Lord their 9God is slow to hearken unto their prayers, to answer them in the day of their trouble.
8 In the day of their peace they esteemed lightly my counsel; but, in the day of their trouble, of necessity they feel after me.
9 Verily I say unto you, notwithstanding their sins, my bowels are filled with compassion towards them. I will not utterly cast them off; and in the day of wrath I will remember mercy.

I totally remember clearly sitting in a room in the Everett Stake Center back when I was pregnant with Kaitlin and having my bishop open up the scriptures to read this. He left and then came back a few minutes later to discuss. I really got it. Yet here I am again. Darn 2x4 method! I don't want to be a user that only turns to the Lord when I need something. I usually do remember to thank him throughout my day, maybe not the past week or two though, but overall I've taken for granted my testimony and God's love. I'm thankful for this reminder because I don't want to go down like some of the people in the scriptures and even whole cities that were buried because they were lax in remembering God at all times. And seriously, losing a few things, being frustrated over my keys in the car are a much more gentle lesson than could have been received for someone as thick-headed as I, so Thank You Heavenly Father. Good looking out. ;)

So funny. I wanted to add a pic to this post and as I went to the LDS.org home page, I noticed the current video message... Choose This Day That just made my day really. God is the Original Kind of Comedy! Lol. I love when all the messages stack up and mesh together all at once...really helps move things along in my 2x4 method of learning. :D